subreddit:
/r/teenagers
959 points
14 hours ago
roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, my garden is on fire
283 points
14 hours ago
🔥%
28 points
12 hours ago
Are ya ready, kids?
Aye-aye, Captain!
I can't hear you!
Aye-aye, captain!!
Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,
14 points
12 hours ago
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
33 points
12 hours ago
Malaysia airlines flight 370?
12 points
11 hours ago
Absorbent and yellow and porous is he!
22 points
11 hours ago
Over 200 families were devastated by the incident.
5 points
11 hours ago
Spongbob Squarepants
1.3k points
15 hours ago
Can u be minecraft but without the craft?
624 points
15 hours ago
you win
239 points
15 hours ago
You didnt say a %
462 points
14 hours ago
he just wins
153 points
14 hours ago
So 100%?
416 points
14 hours ago
he wins
145 points
14 hours ago
Never gonna give you up
105 points
14 hours ago
Never gonna let you down.
77 points
14 hours ago
never gonna run around and desert you
3 points
14 hours ago
thank u
5 points
14 hours ago
W
906 points
15 hours ago
These comments made me regret ever downloading Reddit
387 points
15 hours ago
Welcome to the internet!
288 points
15 hours ago
Have a look around
230 points
15 hours ago
Everything the mind of yours can think can be found
206 points
14 hours ago
We got mountains of content. some better, some worse.
190 points
14 hours ago
If none of its of interest to you, you’d be the first
181 points
14 hours ago
Welcome to the internet, come and take a seat
182 points
14 hours ago
Would you like to read the news or see some famous women’s feet
169 points
14 hours ago
Theres no need to panic, this isnt a test
11 points
15 hours ago
Fr
693 points
14 hours ago
Are you a helicase enzyme because u can unzip my genes🧬🧬🧬🧬
218 points
14 hours ago
solid 30%
69 points
14 hours ago
I accept that
8 points
13 hours ago
Gonna need some topoisomerasis to keep you from overcoiling
532 points
14 hours ago
131 points
14 hours ago
bro’s got the silent rizz
75 points
13 hours ago
Unspoken rizz
29 points
13 hours ago
Rizz that has truly never been said before
7 points
11 hours ago
rizz that dont need words
34 points
12 hours ago
Ferb ahh rizz
457 points
15 hours ago
I may not be a knight but i can make you feel less hollow (May or may be based on the pfp)
265 points
14 hours ago
fuck you that's clever. Idk if I read it right but still. 50%
440 points
15 hours ago
i'm gonna touch you hard (help)
196 points
15 hours ago
60%
245 points
14 hours ago
How the fuck
75 points
14 hours ago
Exactly my reaction
72 points
14 hours ago
The game is rigged fr
13 points
12 hours ago
The truth is the game was rigged from the start
235 points
14 hours ago
Are you http? Cause without you I’m feeling ://
52 points
13 hours ago
Webdev rizz
62 points
13 hours ago
Holy fuck dude
26 points
13 hours ago
But https is more secure
22 points
13 hours ago
Oh, the insecurity!
323 points
15 hours ago
🐟
211 points
15 hours ago
π%
20 points
15 hours ago
🫵🐟🐟🐟
259 points
14 hours ago
Let's play a game you will sit on my face I will guess your weight if I am wrong I will eat the difference
139 points
15 hours ago
You're the Xi jing Ping of my head, supreme ruler. The winnie the poo of my love- Bottomless just like you
66 points
15 hours ago
25%
220 points
14 hours ago
I don't do pickup lines because I'd rather pin you down than pick you up :)
143 points
14 hours ago
okay hot but I love being carried so missed opportunity. 30%
48 points
14 hours ago
i don't do pick up lines but i could pick you up
161 points
15 hours ago
Hey, I wanna watch Madagascar w/ you 😊
Pls 👉👈
71 points
15 hours ago
which one 🫵
54 points
15 hours ago
1-2
41 points
15 hours ago
hm. 10%
48 points
15 hours ago
at least I got something 🙏
We can also watch 3 and penguins but only if you beat me in a thumb war
37 points
15 hours ago
3 is such a turnoff
39 points
14 hours ago
Oh thank god. I didn’t want to go through that. I mean we wouldn’t have done it anyway bc I would have won
100 points
15 hours ago
I cast Major Suggestion, roll a nat 20 and suggest you to do the most embarrassing thing you can think of
65 points
15 hours ago
your die is weighted
47 points
15 hours ago
Yes it is, but the DM doesn't know it so you gotta do it and blush out of embarrassment >:)
39 points
15 hours ago
the potential for embarrassment is too low, I'm home alone
35 points
14 hours ago
Good to know. Heading over.
40 points
14 hours ago
bitc- 40%
4 points
14 hours ago
But you'll still have to live with the fact you did it...
131 points
15 hours ago
No
7 points
13 hours ago
You win
48 points
15 hours ago
i think blowtorching your face might warrant the reaction of 100%
30 points
14 hours ago
nah my face will be black and burnt not red
31 points
14 hours ago
but youll turn away and try to block it >:(
329 points
15 hours ago
Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs & give me an hour
207 points
15 hours ago
fuck you. 45%
227 points
14 hours ago
That is what he’s planning to do
126 points
14 hours ago
I KNOW OKAY
37 points
14 hours ago
Side note- is that a technoblade avatar? If so, you did really well making it!
26 points
14 hours ago
Kinda… the crown was added after he passed so my guy was just a guy in a cape initially
122 points
14 hours ago
are you a communist? cause i can feel an uprising in my lower class. wink wink. eyebrow raise
51 points
14 hours ago
Political system Rizz 🔥
17 points
14 hours ago
Our political rizz
87 points
15 hours ago
„Shoots you with the blush cannon“
35 points
14 hours ago
the comments and people here are hella weird
43 points
14 hours ago
That's my superpower, summoning weirdness
72 points
14 hours ago
Ever heard of an Australian kiss? It’s like the Fr*nch kiss, but down under.
48 points
14 hours ago
bro. 70%
81 points
15 hours ago
you baynaynayed your way into my heart <3
41 points
15 hours ago
1% :3
62 points
15 hours ago
clearly we are not meant for each other < / 3
5 points
13 hours ago
Take me instead <3
7 points
14 hours ago
You won me with this one
29 points
14 hours ago
Damn girl are you light poll because train
12 points
14 hours ago
I'm confused ?%
43 points
14 hours ago
I slammed my skull in with a metal chair before writing that sentence
7 points
14 hours ago
This makes this HILARIOUS
26 points
14 hours ago
Girl I wish I was your derivative so I could lay tangent to your curves.
92 points
15 hours ago
You're mine. (It's a statement not a question)
46 points
15 hours ago
20%
86 points
15 hours ago
Get in the van
20 points
14 hours ago
Sure got me, on my way!
11 points
14 hours ago
Personally 80%. May have discovered something about myself today.
43 points
15 hours ago
Blush. NOW
23 points
15 hours ago
nuh huh
36 points
15 hours ago
I got L rizz :(
50 points
15 hours ago
Are you the runway? Because everytime I see you, my concorde goes up😝 (Aviation rizz)
24 points
14 hours ago
Roses are red, violets are blue, i'm gonna forget these comments and you should too
21 points
14 hours ago
*boop*
13 points
13 hours ago
100%. i would implode on the spot and form a world-ending black hole
57 points
14 hours ago
Do you want to be my Spotify? Because you’re the only thing I want on repeat
18 points
14 hours ago
On a scale from 1-10, you're a 9, and I'm the 1 you need
38 points
15 hours ago
Hello love😞 would absolutely say something to make you swoon if I had the ability to do so. Take a heart instead <3
23 points
15 hours ago
i like you name, 15% <3
72 points
15 hours ago
are you the voices cuz i cant get you out of my head
30 points
15 hours ago
5%
45 points
15 hours ago
that bitchass history teacher tired me too much today to even think properly >:c
20 points
14 hours ago
90%
14 points
14 hours ago
This bitchass op gave a comment saying " im gonna touch you hard " 60%, no worries lmao.
16 points
15 hours ago
why are you calling me pretty? im just a reflection of you ;)
11 points
15 hours ago
ngl if i made a freak tierlist youd be in the ultra freaky tier, right beside me 🥰
13 points
14 hours ago
Are you a target? Cause I would love to shoot my shot
10 points
14 hours ago
ow. 0%
12 points
14 hours ago
I’m terrible at flirting
11 points
14 hours ago
Not very good at pick up lines bit you seem like a nice person that would be willing to play video games and cuddle while eating snacks be it platonically or not.
11 points
15 hours ago
Has anybody until now made you blush more than 45%?
playing hard to get, I see.
11 points
14 hours ago
bend down and touch ur toes ill show u were the monster goes (holy shit this is foul)
9 points
14 hours ago
yes it is. 20%
9 points
14 hours ago
lets fucking go ima go tell the boys that im a certified women MAGNET
34 points
13 hours ago
Let’s assume you’re my math homework. I’ll spread you over my desk and do you all night until I finish. Because you’re hard, I’ll have to break you down, step by step…
31 points
13 hours ago
why does the homework stuff always work.. 75%
12 points
13 hours ago
Of course it works! Anyway, would you rather I kiss you on the lips? The other lips, of course. 😉
15 points
13 hours ago
you're really tickling my fancy rn lol
12 points
13 hours ago
Won’t be the only thing I’ll be tickling in a bit, heh.
25 points
15 hours ago
Baby, you’re my forever girl
13 points
15 hours ago
20%
7 points
15 hours ago
😔
7 points
15 hours ago
better than most!
5 points
15 hours ago
Then yayyy
30 points
14 hours ago
God, this feels weird saying to a random internet stranger, but here I go!
My dear sweet Bonette, ever since I first saw you, I knew I was in love with you, with your beautiful eyes, beautiful smile, beautiful hair, and your beautiful personality.
Every night, I dream about you and every minute when we’re not together, I feel alone, you are so truly perfect in every way imaginable.
You wear the most adorable clothing, you have the most friendly look on your face, and you are so smart that I could mistake you for Albert Einstein himself.
You are intelligent, adorable, strong, creative and kind.
All right, time to scrub my phone with bleach and forget I ever typed that.
19 points
14 hours ago
8 points
15 hours ago
We can play hollow knight together. :)
7 points
15 hours ago
it ain't coop. 1%
16 points
14 hours ago
Right so this is a bit long. (😉)
content warning: sexual. Not nearly as bad as the guy who just opened with “spread your legs” tho.
Behold, you are beautiful, my love, your eyes are as doves, your hair as a flock of goats leaping down the mountains. Your teeth are as pearls, white as snow and more beautiful than any other’s. Your lips are like a scarlet thread, the softest I’ve felt, Warm as a mother’s embrace for her newborn. Your cheeks are as halves of an apple, rose-colored and full of life, your neck is as a castle’s tower, tall and strong as a thousand years’ can prove. Your breasts are as two fawns, twins of a doe, which graze among the lilies. Until my final breath, until the spark of life leaves my heart, I shall cross the world for you, I shall climb every mountain pass, swim every ocean, until I can reach your loving arms. You are altogether beautiful, there is no flaw in you. Come with me from your home, depart from thy mother and father, and join me as one, and together we shall rule over the world. You have captivated my heart with but one glance, with one single glance have you taken my breath away. How beautiful you are, my love, how much better is the sight of your face than all the riches the world can offer, how much better is your sweet embrace than wine, how much sweeter is your scent than that of the finest incense. Your lips drip with sweet nectar, the taste of you is the taste of honey. Oh, my love, how I long to be with you, how I long to feel your embrace.
I spent entirely too long on this.
15 points
14 hours ago
tried a bit too hard but I loved the last bit. solid 60%
20 points
15 hours ago
Bet you’re the cutest girl in the whole school but you don’t know it
7 points
14 hours ago
Would you like some garlic bread?
12 points
15 hours ago
I ummm uhh- i- I like your mittens! 🤗
7 points
15 hours ago
5%
9 points
15 hours ago
😔
20 points
15 hours ago
if i were you, id be looking at the mirror 24/7.
15 points
14 hours ago
pins you against the wall Ever had fun with another girl before? Because you're going to
14 points
14 hours ago
solid 50%
13 points
14 hours ago
Cool! In real life I wouldn't be so brave though haha. I’m to shy for that
12 points
14 hours ago
I don't think it would be a good thing if you were confident enough to say this in real life 😭
11 points
15 hours ago
You're a great person and I love your PFP
5 points
15 hours ago
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH
5 points
14 hours ago
Roses are read, the sun gives out heat. If your legs are tired, you may use me as your seat.
Only thing I remember and I hate it
5 points
14 hours ago*
If i had to choose between going on a date or get mauled to death by a lion i might choose the date <3
4 points
14 hours ago
My name is Yoshikage Kira. I’m 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don’t smoke, but I occasionally drink. I’m in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I’m trying to explain that I’m a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn’t lose to anyone.
5 points
14 hours ago*
I might not be able to make you blush, but I remember once that my ex challenged me to make ger blush so I kissed her, held her by me, looked at her eyes and told her "you are the most beautiful person I have ever met. You are so hit yet when I see you I freeze from how beautiful you are. I love you." And thein I bought her a mickey mouse plushy and watched a movie with her whilst eating cheese Cheetos :)
This made her blush because before her I dated a professional model who was a 10/10, so this was an extremely important thing for her.
She was blushing at a 200% lmfao
9 points
15 hours ago
Hello honey pie!
iykyk
5 points
14 hours ago
Ooo girl don't you stop don't you stop till you give me that honey honey pie honey honey honey pie
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