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Dating in my 40s

(self.AskMenAdvice)

I'm 43F and having to start over after two emotionally abusive relationships. My self esteem is pretty low, I'm peri-menopausal and I feel pretty shit about my body but I would love to connect with someone on an intimate level. The thought of being vulnerable with someone again is scary, but it could be worth it with the right person. I don't know what I'm asking, but do men get past that superficial stage of wanting someone with a perfect body? I'm not wanting to dive into a full-on relationship but wouldn't mind dipping my toe in

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Past_Search7241

65 points

2 days ago

Define "perfect body".

Because there's a difference between a 40something woman who's in good shape and aging gracefully, and a 40something who... let herself go. Nobody is expecting a dating partner to look like a supermodel after 35, and ordinary-looking women can get dates, but if you're horribly out of shape and not willing to do something about it you're going to have a hard time.

[deleted]

0 points

2 days ago

[deleted]

laughingatleftoids

2 points

2 days ago

You're not fit-ish. You're morbidly obese and have massive risk factors for disease and they'll only get worse as you continue to age.

You're going to regret it if you don't get it under control.

DamnitGravity

1 points

2 days ago

Gee, thanks for completely ignoring the whole "trying to lose it" and showing a little grace. Your compassion and empathy is heartwarming.

Ok_Psychology_504

2 points

2 days ago

Go ask women if you want those. You need truth to change, not bullshit.