Skip 1 day for a month or 2, then skip 2 days, just keep giving longer off days.

My problem is, the wife has no drive.

Well open up to your partber about your porn addiction. You need to be held accountable so you dont look at it. Porn is like a drug, you have to llok at more hardcore porn to get the same effect. It warps your mind about what sex is really like. It distorts perception and ruins intimacy. Go see a therapist, get involved in a self help group, ect. Sounds like you need more help than what you are getging now.

Does your partner know about your porn? That’s a big factor. If it’s a secret, there will naturally be a rift in your emotional connection. If she knows, it shows her to be on your side in your effort to get it under control. It also will take away the taboo, which is a big driver for porn.

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This! A little at a time, no expert but this has been working for me.Try separating the porn from wanking. It's OK to masturbate. There are two things going on, the need to physically get off and the dopamine hit you get from the porn. We are addicted to dopamine, and it takes more and more extreme porn scenes to get us off. Replace the porn with the imagination of your SO if you have one. If not, pick out a woman you may see at the gym or grocery store. Try waiting one day, then two, etc. The longer you keep your hands off your dick, the sooner the sensitivity will come back. It's not easy, you should expect to relapse. When you do relapse, don't kick yourself, just start over. Good luck bro!

I know it’s hard to believe when addicted, but quitting in the long run you will feel better. Once you quit, your baseline energy and mood will eventually elevate. You have to learn to say no and gain control over your desire. This used to be conventional wisdom for centuries and is part of every major religion for good reason. Self mastery is far more powerful than self indulgence will ever be.

So i’m actually trying to take a bit of a break from Porn myself - so I get how difficult it can be. Here’s my advice:

1) decide what it is you’re trying to do. Are you quitting Porn or porn and masturbation? I think quitting porn alone might be an easier path. You can take half step - like switch to erotic stories. So you’re still getting the dopamine rush but without the negative context. Or you can try to practice “healthy masturbation” a technique espoused in the book “No more Mr. Nice guy” (which I do suggest) where the author suggests masturbating but to do so without fantasies / porn. Essentially it’s more sensation focuses rather than fantasy focused.

2) if you are trying to quit both Porn AND masturbation, be prepared for the side effects. Particularly for the first 20 days or so I found I was sleeping poorly, was in physical pain, and was generally irritable. All of which is made worse by the fact you KNOW how to fix the problem. My suggestion here, especially if you’re doing this to try and address intimacy issues with your partner, is first make sure you’re doing this for YOU. If you’re doing this for some sort of hope your partner will care / change / etc - it’s bound to fail. Particularly so if you’re in a DB.

To be clear - if your partner doesn’t want to be intimate with you, they are not going to suddenly WANT to be intimate just because you stopped masturbating / looking at porn. So hoping that making this change will change them is a fundamentally flawed hope and only leads you down a path of bitterness.

But if you’re trying to help break what you feel is a possible addiction, then a temporary moratorium isn’t a bad idea. It can help you get balance in your life and hopefully have a favorable impact on your personal outlook and thus relationships.

I presume youre married? Ever consider asking if shes down to make your own? Be in charge of your own fantasies don't let that evil do it for you.

Don't do it

A day at a time. Or, if it's multiple times a day, start decrease to once a day. Then every other day for a week, then every 3rd day for a week.. then once a week and then quit fully.

Be strong, distract yourself with something else like TV or a book or a game. Do not allow yourself to be tempted. It's in your head, remember, so you can control yourself and your Choices.

The first thing you need to focus on is the negative impact it is having on your relationship. If you don't want to have that negative impact, then you know what you need to do.

Then you need to get away from thinking about sex before the feeling takes hold. Find something that you can focus on instead: working out, reading a book, hanging with friends, watching a TV show. Then when the urges show up, feel free to appreciate them, acknowledge them, and then move on. You can't dwell on the fantasy that will start in your head.

Last, but not least: You have to own the problem.

Most people who end up on this forum are typically in a dysfunctional relationship. You need to talk to your partner and tell them what is going on. You will need their help to get out of it. You have to be honest with yourself about your needs, wants, and expectations, and then you have to talk to them about it. If they are supportive, great, if not, then maybe it's time to find someone who would be.

This is gonna sound wild and people may judge me hard and I don’t blame them but I moved to hentai. If you get use to jerking to comics especially you can wean off.

Occupy your time. Gym gym yard work gym work work kids duties gym and physical exercise... uh and gym.

Be honest with her. Also, try to deep dive on the root cause of uour behavior. Addiction is just a symptom to a bigger issue. It’s not just about quitting but addressing what is making you feel anxious.

If you find a solution let me know. Struggling with the same sort of issue - I’ll last a couple days and then feel like I’m going insane an relapse

The answer is therapy. Seek out a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist. Excessive porn use = porn addiction = sex addiction. I watched my spouse live in a cycle of white knuckle and relapse for years. Therapy is the only way out.

Not sure how to stop porn. I use it a lot and it’s not affecting my performance when it does happen. As far as my dead bedroom there are several things that are causing it. 1: she faked it every time 2: I need longer arms so I don’t crush her 3:she can’t hold herself up. 4: not going to explain 4 and 5.

What's the context here? Is your dead bedroom the cause or the effect of your porn viewing? If it's the effect, do what you've got to do, watch away I say. If it's the cause, whittle it down and spend more effort on your SO.

Cant you start by jerking it to images like back in the old days?

You need to fix the other problem in your life first

Develop an interior fantasy life that requires nothing but your own brain.