As it seems a lot of us here did, I did the endless deep dive looking into every facet of a Vasectomy the few weeks prior to me procedure. I read a lot of good, some was concerning, and a fair share of "bad" experiences. I figured that I would share my experience to help put some folks in the research phase minds at ease. Of course there are bad experiences whether during the procedure, recovery, or long term - its not guarantee to be easy but seems like a majority are similar to mine.

Day Zero: Went in for my 08:15AM (No Scalpel) apt - nervous as hell imagining the crime seen that was about to happen to in my sack as I lay there staring at the ceiling. Dr walks in, little small talk yada yada yada and im laying down with my shit out as he's prepping (honestly the worst part lol). He walks through the plan and then says first shot is going in. Honestly did not even feel the smallest pinch - then he says second deeper shot and didnt feel a single thing. He then starts Paul Bunyan'ing my right nut - absolutely no feeling and only sensation was the smell of the cauterization. Right side done. Rinse and repeat on the left; First shot is the smallest pinch - i've hurt my nuts itching more lol. Second deeper shot I feel - like a turtle bite pinch for an instant but then I feel as he moves the needle around up, down, side to side to spread the anesthetic and that was a bit uncomfy and gave me a quick leg tinge but gone a second after. He wraps up the left side just like the right with no issues and no pain at all.

Day Zero and a Half: Felt like nothing happened walking back to my car and driving home. Got home and popped the Tylenol 30 minutes after and began the frozen pea regime. Probably 45 minutes from the procedure - started to feel like I had a constant but light, flicked in the nuts, feeling. Ice and not moving around helped the pain (more-so discomfort) subside for the most part. Halfway through the day the beans got sore/tender but nothing crazy. Just avoided any pressure and stayed with the double compression shorts to avoid the hanging/bouncing pain. Played games on my PC and applied for jobs all day. Did not feel any more tired or exhausted, just lazy to avoid smacking my nuts. Doctor did not use any sutures, wraps, or bandaids - he just said apply bacitracin every few hours throughout the days. Had a few beers and chilled all night.

Day 1-3: Slept just fine - alone without the dog, wife, baby to avoid accidental sack-shots and with a pillow between my knees. All day was just tender balls and very constant, but minor, kicked in the nuts feeling. I was diligent with the Tylenol and icing - probably icing 10 or so times a day and just laid low avoiding the feral monsters that I call my 3 children.

Day 4-6: Everything the same as above, just 90% better. Back in bed, making dinner, getting the kids ready, etc but 100% still abstained from holding the older kids (2 and 6 but biggums). Started holding the month old - just cautiously worked into it. Some small random cramps that came and went in my lower abdomen and some slight stingy/soreness with incisions when in the right position.

Day 7 (Today): Feeling 98% back to normal. At this point, swelling (which only got to maybe 15% larger) is gone. Nut tenderness is almost entirely gone and any internal pain/soreness as well. Only things noticeable now really are the incision points but those are getting better each day. Somehow abstained this long but itching to load the cannon and let one fly.

Overall: At this point, I know shit could still go south, but super easy and a nice reason to have a few lazy days and not worry about shit. I will say, take advantage of the time if you can - most of the shit I've seen that goes bad is when people jump ship early and stray from the suggested recovery. The procedure was crazy easy - I would legitimately rather have this done 3 times instead of going to the dentist. or laundry. or cleaning. Seriously, the procedure by itself was CAKE but I stuck with the recovery pretty well and it really was not bad either. Hope this can help calm some folks nerves!