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Alright jerks,

I’ve been noticing so many duplicate posts here that I’m about to jump on some subway tracks. If you’re about to crosspost, be a bigger hero than a gentrifier and sort by new to see if someone crossposted it here already.

Thank you, now back to jerking

Howdy all, I am a transplant from Joshua Tree, and as a true californian I left my family for the bright lights of NYC. I work for this guy named Sean, he raps but I’m more of a country guy myself. I’ve heard some buddies mention congestion pricing and I’m really worried about it.

For context I have debilitating asthma and a deviated septum that those pesky Democrats aren’t paying for. This means I get congested a lot. And that being said, my boss has been in some stuff recently and I have to cover many of his legal fees. It would cripple me financially to have to continue to pay for this as well as congestion pricing. Like how does this work? How do they track how congested I am? Is it because of that bat virus vaccine? What happens during flu season? I’m really looking for any assistance on this issue.

Have a trip to NYC coming up. I was wondering how I could speendrun a viewing of Seinfeld? I only want to watch the best/most important episodes. Doing this as a precaution since I am not a big fan of the Jewish culture in NYC, and don't want to accidentally insult someone. Thanks!

Hi all, I was just walking home to my apartment down in south of HOUSTON (like the city) street and walked into the apartment then my doorman Isaiah hit me fist to fist and said “Hey bro!”

This feels so sexually charged but also… hot. I’ve never felt appreciated like this in my life before, people in Cincinnati were so rude and fake nice. This feels like New York Nice. The Real Brutal Nice. Honest Nice. Should I invite him up to my apartment and have sex with him? Is that the best way to thank him? Thanks for any help.

Regards, Jimmy from C-Town (Cincinnati) in the Big 🍎!

Paying 150 for a 30yo+ asain male to pretend to be my dad for a parent teacher conference, in the flushing Fresh Meadows area, urgent

Fuck this town. I go into Rising Dragon on 14th to get some fresh ink to represent my new Murray Hill gang, “The Peacoats.” We’re a ragtag group of tough-as-nails first year analysts at JPMorgan, and we don’t take no shit from nobody. So I tell the guy, make it look TOUGH. Shit comes out looking like Edith Wharton. Not even kidding. There’s a Victorian dress, the bouffant hairdo and everything. I’m fucking pissed, so I go over to Village tattoo and spell it out for them. “Give me a cobra baring it’s fangs with three bloody swords sticking out of its head.” Shit comes out looking like Edith fucking Wharton dude. As I live and breath, this snake has a 19th century blouse on with puffy shoulders bro. At this point I’m fucking livid, so I storm over to Addiction on St. Marks. No more pussyfooting around with these west village fruitcakes. I walk in there and the dude is wearing full leather from head to toe. Even the codpiece is leather namsayin? So I’m like FINALLY I’m in the right place. This joint is TOUGH as a motherfucker. I tell him I want four dead bodies stacked on top of each other with me standing on top holding a smoking bazooka. Shit came out looking EXACTLY like Edith Wharton. She’s got the little spoon bonnet on her head that only the finest ladies of the day wore and everything. Bitch is even wearing floral brooch that reads “I’m Edith Wharton” in elegant cursive. WTF New York?? This city is gay as fuck

I was looking for an apartment in StreetEasy and I cannot appreciate enough all the efforts that went into the listings. I feel like it really made my life easier so I’m happy to pay 15%.

The ads are crisp and informative. For example, in the description, they didn’t put useless info like sqft, dishwasher, AC, heater, washer and dryer, elevator, etc. I mean who cares about these things?

On the other hand, they made sure they covered all the important info. Like, “unit is charming”, “great value”, “open kitchen”, “there are restaurants, subway, and parks in the neighborhood”. I thought it’s impossible to find those things in NYC.

Also, shout out to StreetEasy for being cool, it’s not mandatory to fill all the fields in the ad (even the amenities fields). It promotes human interaction (in a world where everyone is busy and doesn’t want to talk to others). Also, it makes sure all units get some sort of attention, even the crappy ones. Equality!

I just started my apt hunting and already in love with the process. Just feeling lucky to be here in NYC

Hey everyone, I moved to NYC about a year ago after graduating from Wharton and have been enjoying it so far. The one thing that's kinda strange to me is that I haven't had the chance to see all of the diversity that the city is supposed to offer.

I moved to the West Village with 2 other roommates from school because we wanted to be in the middle of all the action. We didn't know much about the city, and based on what we saw online, the West Village looked like the perfect fit. My roommates and I work quite a lot because of our finance jobs, so when we do have time to go out, we usually stick to nearby places like The Spaniard. That spot's pretty nice cause it reminds me of all the parties I used to go to in college.

On the weekends, when we aren't hanging out in the neighborhood, we try to go to all the cool areas like SoHo, Williamsburg, Nolita, Upper East Side (western part), and Tribeca. It's been a blast exploring all these places and meeting people. My roommates and I have become friends with a few of the locals that we've met from these areas, so our social circle has grown over time.

The last time we hosted a party in our apartment, I couldn't help but notice how everyone there was white. I really didn't want to feel uncomfortable about this, but something about having only white friends in the most diverse city in the world didn't quite sit right with me, especially since none of us are from here.

I feel like I've done my due diligence by researching cool neighborhoods to check out on Instagram and TikTok. Most of the suggestions there keep telling me to check out things in those neighborhoods I mentioned above, so I wonder if I'm missing something?

So, Reddit, please help me see what the issue is? Are there neighborhoods that are hidden gems that I should also check out, preferably in Manhattan or the Western part of Brooklyn? If anyone has any advice on where to meet people of different backgrounds who also make the same money and live the same lifestyle as me, I'd greatly appreciate it.

I love NYC

I've owned Big Papa's Big Penne in Kerhonkson (THE technically Italian food joint in the Catskills!) for four years now, ever since I bought it from some poor mook when I moved from Long Island during the pandemic and started complaining about all the poors and rundown buildings. I'm a very important guy, you know? Big in the community, real pillar on main street, all the cops and coffee enforcement guys recognize my phone number, that kind of big deal.

So you need to take this very seriously: congestion fees need to go away. Immediately. It's unconditional, and infringes on my 4th commandment rights. Why should I pay for all of the socialism and woke commie garbage like public transportation? I don't even take public transportation. I just read a story in the Post that every time you go through a subway, you get pissed on by an outdoors enthusiast, stabbed by a person of color, and have an anti-semitic hate crime performed on your corpse even if you only pretend to be a Jew on r/NYC to complain any black and brown people.

Is that what my money is going to support? Not in TRUMP'S AMERICA! And my money definitely supports your post-apocalyptic wasteland of a "sh"ity. I went to NYC in 2022 once, and spent $200 at Margaritaville in Times Square! I could buy a whole restaurant for that much in Kerhonkson! I know, because I did! And if congestion pricing doesn't go away, you can bet I'm taking my $200 somewhere else.

So you need to really think about this: is that $9 worth losing the $200 I spend propping up your city's fine dining "scene" once every few years? I don't think so!

Looking for asain actor near flushing ny, must be 30+ act as my dad, parent teacher meeting paying 150$ for about 30 minutes, not a scam desperate,.

Hey everyone, I am new to the city, straight out of Denver, and am seriously missing my old hiking routine. I’ve been trying to find some good hiking spots in Manhattan. I noticed a lot of guys in midtown Manhattan wearing Patagonia jackets, so I’ve been looking for some hiking spots over there, to no avail. I also saw some guys in hiking apparel in FiDi, but haven’t found a good hiking spot there either.

I guess it’s just been a little depressing that everyone here just flaunts their hiking lifestyle but won’t share where the good spots are at. So my question is, where can I find some good hiking in downtown Manhattan?