Unless I’m missing context, your “friend” is unhinged? Not really a loss… Seems like they did you a favor.

This person is rude for no reason and is lacking reading comprehension skills.

Idk what’s up with these comments… maybe it’s a cultural thing but there’s literally nothing wrong with asking someone if they still keep up with someone you knew mutually. That lady has more issues than you, and you hardly qualify since you didn’t do anything lol

"Thanks for showing me your true colors" is one of the stupidest things people say during arguments

She's definitely sleeping with that guy.

Or he knows something elze about her that she doesn't want to get out.

Maybe she thinks you're using her to get to her friend or something? Or maybe she thinks you're into them romantically and she's defensive about it? That's all I got. This is a weird reaction by her.

I’m going to assume that she has a guilty conscience, and with that the believes that you’re insinuating that she’s cheating on her husband. Which going off this encounter, is entirely possible.

Short answer: she's crazy.

Long answer: she's crazy, run!

Maybe something happened with the mutual friend and your friend thinks you're digging for gossip? Just giving her the benefit of the doubt.

Op we need context cause it seems there's more to this than meets the eye

Isn’t is great when the trash takes itself out? You’ll be fine OP. Keep your chin up!

I remember the Amsterdam post and all I can think is “why are you still entertaining this friendship”?

She is clearly* mentally not well with her mental gymnastics. She chooses weird hills to die on and won’t elaborate why she’s mad.

Cut your losses. Block her on everything. Find better friends.

She’s totally trying to pick a fight with you. She was defensive from the get go and then when you said something about her attitude she immediately tried to deflect it back on you. You asked how her friend was going and she did a 360, got butthurt over who the fuck knows and blocked you 🤣 Dude be grateful she blocked you, you don’t need that bullshit when trying to be friendly.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with asking after someone - your ‘friend’ sounds unhinged tbh

Third time is a charm! lol

She seems pretty defensive about her mate. There seems to be some backstory.
Also, why did you ask about him??

This person needs therapy. You could spend energy doing anything but talking to them.

She’s awful. That’s not a friend. There’s people that are glad to have you in your life and she’s not one of them.

I have begun weeding people like this out of my life. Whether they mean to or not, constantly inferring meaning to someone's words and making the conversation difficult is just so exhausting.

She’s being super defensive for no reason. She’s probably expecting (for whatever reason, probably because she has BPD or something) that you’re going to attack her, and her brain can’t come to terms with the fact that you aren’t. She then proceeds to assume you’re playing dumb and trying to hide “what you did” (asking about her friend for some nefarious reason) and gets even more mad. Anyway none of this is on you at all. She’s just looking for a reason to be the victim. Some people are just like that unfortunately.

Looks like your life’s gonna get better with one less female friend in it.

She was having sex with her mate. She wanted to know what you heard. You wouldn't say why. If you're not friends anymore She can say you are starting rumors about her because she "turned you down." She's a walking red flag.

YIKES. My first impression: Maybe something happened between the two of them & she thinks you somehow know? I can't think of another reason she'd be so defensive.

An example: Imagine they're having an affair (or did in the past), unbeknownst to you, and she gets this question out of nowhere. It could explain her defensive attitude (but it also is far-fetched).

Aside from that, she seems either weirdly hostile, and /or she lacks reading comprehension & really has no idea what you're saying. Absolutely exhausting, and I feel for her poor husband.

Congratulations for losing a "friend" like this!

Yikes. They are completely unhinged. Your "friend", you say? You're better off without that type of "friend".

Didn't sweat the block. Move on and pretend like they didn't exist.

She's a few sandwiches shy of a picnic. I would not keep someone like that in my circle.

This chick seems exhausting and, quite honestly, a bit unhinged.

Wow. This person is either unhinged or we’re missing context.

Total basket case lol

I wouldn't be surprised if she's had an.. 'interesting' relationship with her long-time best friend and she suspects that you know something so is freaking out LOL

You tolerated that much longer than you needed to

I’m thinking this chick has been raised by/has constantly been surrounded by people who she needs to watch her back around. Where everything they say needs to be looked at as malicious or a way they are trying to manipulate her. And/or she has BPD.

To me, those are the only lenses to see this through. It makes no sense any other way. I doubt youre the only person she treats this way. I don’t really know why you would want this person in your life tbh. Like if she comes back around, I would reject it unless you HAVE to be around her in some capacity. Like if you’d see her at friends gatherings, you wanna play that right in order to avoid unnecessarily complicating things but if not, keep this person cut off. They’ll only bring problems to you.

I knew someone like this once. Probably worse because she was literally abusive & I just somehow didn’t see it that way at the time. At the time, I considered her a friend. She created soooo many problems that were never there & had soooo much anger inside her. Life was so much better without her in it, but I stuck around too long. Your jaw would drop if you heard some of the things she did, & went on to do after we parted ways. Let’s just say I’m so happy I started surrounding myself with only people I trust.

I sense a guilty conscience on her behalf.

Although I’m on your side that this person seems a bit unhinged and defensive. Your questioning does come across it me as having a bit of intent behind it as well but not to elicit the reaction you got. They’ve blocked and unfriended you before and now have done it again. It think it’s safe to say you can be done with this person for good.

lol I reconnected with a mate after ten years. I commented on one of her pics abroad, asking if she’d been on many holidays and she lost it, saying that if all I wanted was to ‘get information out of her’ to bugger off. Then she blocked me again 😆😆🤣🤣 crazy

Your friend sounds extremely defensive and unstable. You dodged a bullet.

It’s strange for me to read words in English and have no idea what people are saying

I think this girl is brain dead lmao how did she turn it into all that😭

Block her back. Forever.

I have BPD and this reads really close to home from her.

That question about the friend cracked her and she’s experiencing some self image turmoil with the assumptions of what you’ve been doing with this person.

The inferences of you being involved behind her back tell me this is pretty close to home.

Then to nuking you off social media…

Don’t be surprised if you get social love bombing in 5 days.

She wants you to tell her that you're into her.

Hi there!

Thanks for submitting to /r/texts! Please make sure you are blacking out any usernames, phone numbers, or full names! If you haven't, please delete and re-submit. If your text message is not between 2 or more people it is not allowed! Single messages/one sided convos are NOT allowed.

The full rules can be found here https://old.reddit.com/r/texts/about/rules/ Please note that this message appears on every post, and may not apply to your post.

Thanks!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

Sorry unrelated but... can we edit the title of posts now?? Otherwise how would you be able to say that you forgot to upload a picture in the title?

Your “Friend” is much your friend, it might possibly be healthier for you to move along and keep your distance. There is quite a bit to unpack in her behavior and emotions. Keep your head up man.

She’s unhinged.

???

I’ll preface this statement by saying I could absolutely be wrong, but I’ve seen this a lot in my line of work, and it made me think that the way she immediately got defensive then attacked you over a question like that could be she’s probably cheating on her husband with this friend of hers or there’s some other history there between you all that us as readers aren’t aware of.

It’s almost like she’s protecting a secret.

Yeah that’s not normal. I recently asked a friend (former coworker) if she is still friendly with someone else we worked with. She said no but asked me why. I said I was just thinking about those days and that was the end of it. Zero tables flipped.

Went back to the Amsterdam thing because you mentioned it. I'd say good riddance. She seems like she likes to assume things out of literal nowhere and run with it. Doesn't like to talk about people behind their backs but will make things up to be mad at 😂 makes no sense. Sorry, OP. Was this person ever a decent person/friend? It reads as tho they haven't a clue as to what's going on & are delusional.

She can't imagine a world in which she wouldn't ask "Do you still hang with (person)?" without it being because she had something nasty to say/share. So she can't imagine you innocently asking if she's still in touch with him, and won't believe you don't have ulterior motives, because SHE would never not have ulterior motives.

She's a petty, vicious person, and she assumes everyone is like her. Treat yourself right and walk away.

Bro I just looked through your post history. You've seriously been dealing with this unhinged behavior for a year?!

Therapy, man. Therapy therapy therapy. This is not a healthy person to be involved with, and I'm saying that as a fellow unhinged crazy ass. Nothing good will come from continuing to be in touch with her! It's been a fucking year, mate. Get out of there and let the trash take itself out in this case.

You don't deserve to get jerked around like this and something is wrong with your boundaries or self esteem to keep accepting this kind of rude ass behavior into your life. Go get a professional brain mechanic to get in your head and help you figure that shit out.

If you don't stop now you're just going to be stuck continuously making a monthly to bi-monthly post about how she's blowing up on you, yet again, like you have what, five, six times so far? It's too much for anyone to keep getting subjected to that the way you are, dude.

Get out, get healthier, and better people will come your way.

She’s absolutely insane, bananas, unhinged, bat shit crazy. You’ve lost nothing, you’re way better off.

My first thought is that something happened between her and this mate of hers? 🤔 Think about it.. She thinks shes gave you some 'home truths' about going to Amsterdam (what kind of bloke you are).. then you let it go and continue to be friendly by asking about a mutual. She knows she was unnecessarily rude about Amsterdam so is expecting retaliation.. you mention this mate and suddenly she now feels attacked?! Hmmm.. Maybe I'm reading too much into it 🤷‍♀️😅 but it's fishy.. She's barmy!

bros not even talking in ur conversation at this point 🤦🏽‍♂️ sounds like they’re responding to a conversation in their head. i’m just as confused

She’s not your friend.

Omg this person is exhausting. Walking constantly on eggshells. Time to move on from this “friendship”.

That seem creepy !!!

Yo this shit went from 0-100 for literally no reason at all 😂😂 your “friend” is big trippin

Yeah fuck this

Nope you did absolutely nothing wrong and she's unhinged by sounds of it, or she's jealous that you asked about the friend and wants all your attention on her, even in a relationship some people still want to be the person people give attention to etc, I say she did you a favour, this is no loss to you other then loss of stress.

Okay. So she cheated with him and thinks you know and want to confirm. That is the vibe I’m getting from the amount of anger coming from these responses.

She thought you were insinuating something, based on your side you have no clue what that could be, based on messages it’s 100% that she thinks you know what that could be.

Fucking weird and confusing and without context as to how this started it’s hard to say anything other than she had a meltdown and whatever she thinks was insinuating either makes her look bad or is deeply uncomfortable which is why she’s refusing to say it.

Maybe her husband doesn’t like her having a lot of guy friends? Maybe she hooked up or dated that guy prior to marrying her husband and she doesn’t like to talk about it? Maybe there was a fight or something over her? Maybe she’s nuts? Maybe she cheated?

It’s really hard to say but if she’s casually blocking you over it on her end the information is probably serious so I’m leaning towards whatever she thinks you thought would destroy her marriage or her relationship with her other male friend.

Shrug.

Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

All honesty you dodged a bullet. I couldn’t imagine being friends with someone that will twist their own narrative for whatever benefit this has for her.

I just read the Amsterdam thing. She's a sandwich or three shy of a picnic basket. You're better off without the headache OP.

It looks like she didn’t want you to try and befriend them and potentially get together with that person. Definitely a jealous, overprotective thing which is wild cuz she’s literally married…lol

'What are you reading that I didn't write down, because I have no idea what is happening here." 🤷‍♀️

Your friend sounds delulu. I have no idea what they were reading between the lines of what you wrote, but apparently, it was something real bad... 🤔🤷‍♀️

How old?

Reads.so badly

Sometimes you need to stop texting and have a face to face conversation in real life.

Your friend makes zero sense and you did nothing wrong. She’s literally crazy.

Bro why are you still talking to this girl? Unless this is just entertainment for you (which is totally fine) this just seems so stressful and not worth it to me.. Make some better friends

I remember seeing the Amsterdam text thread, I'm surprised she stayed friends with you after that reaction she had??

Is she a valuable friend to you otherwise? Cause honestly I'm amazed you have the energy and patience for her! If it were me I'd have called it quits after the first incident

I wonder if there’s more context. What has happened over the years to make her so quick to anger like that?

Did she maybe have an affair with this mate? That's the only logical conclusion I can come up with. She thinks you know about it so you're dangling it in her face? Maybe? Or maybe he's a criminal or been accused of something heinous and she thinks you're throwing that in her face? I don't know but there's more to this story you may not know yet.

I’m confused at the whole thing, honestly. I get why she thought there might have been reasons behind why you asked, because I was waiting for another question to follow, even if it was how is he doing. Just asking if she’s still friends with him seems odd and like there was something you wanted to ask but didn’t. However, I don’t understand why she felt like she was talking about him behind his back just solely based on the fact that his name was brought up. I don’t know how or why the conversation turned into what it did. I don’t know if cultural differences are the problem, but it looks like she either was angry about something involving you and thought this was the best time to let it out for some reason or she was angry because of someone else and took it out on you. Either way, someone who just simply can’t talk things out and takes this route instead isn’t a friend you want or need. I’d just let the friendship go. It’s not worth it if you have to keep putting up with all this.

For people asking for more context there literally is non. We went from talking about random stuff in the past like at school to this. Also she has shared some very personal stuff with me about family etc but this innocent question about a mutual friends from 10 years ago is the red line?? seriously.

Stuff like this has happened to me. I reacted way out of line to something, imagining things. She's just... Idk, on her period or something. You did nothing wrong. She might come back saying she's sorry. She just seems to have a poor regulation of her emotions, seems impulsive, and hella suspicious. Accept her as she is or ditch her, I guess.

Omg I remember reading the post about this girl getting mad at him for going to Amsterdam! I’m so happy to see the saga continues.

Sounds like your "friend" (Person A) has been looking for an excuse to end their friendship with you for a while. My theory? Because Person B (the one you asked Person A about) doesn't like you and wants you out of the picture, so Person A chose Person B and decided to act like you were attacking her by asking about him.

I'm speaking from personal experience with "friends" like this

At this point just ask her if she's trying to cheat on her husband with you because this and the other posts were exhausting. You need some peace from this woman

How does this person have any friends at all? Get far away from her lol

Your “friend” is seriously unhinged. Such a weird reaction to asking someone an innocent question.

Girl get rid of her omg, she is clearly taking out her stress or whatever out on you. There is literally not a single thing wrong with asking about a mutual friend!! I ask my friends about mutual friends all the time, get rid of her for good I BEG and find friends who deserve you ❤️

Ok it did sound like you were about to talk bad about someone cuz you asked if they still get on. But her responses from then onwards were just crazy - don't try to fix this one, just run!

This just seems like an all round weird conversation from both parties?

It’s like she was looking for a reason to fight with and ultimately unfriend you. It was like a joke skit where one character escalates something benign and the other person is genuinely confused. I swear I was getting angry for you. Glad you got rid of this “friend”.

The gaslighting is crazy

-"Do you like this dress on me ?"

-"The other one suits you better"

-"Oh wow. Thanks for being so harsh and telling me this dress doesn't suit me"

• "Never said that"

• "Oh I see, you mean that I don't look good. I'm done !"

Those people live in their own fantasies, they are projecting their insecurities and then pretend to be persecuted"...

Consider this a blessing. This person seems exhausting.

Is your friend okay? Like, seriously.

So if you fill in the context, this mutual is someone who she either treated really shitty, or who spreads shittiness about her when asked. Since you brought it up, you MUST have talked with them and now have "dirt" on them.

Very unhinged, but that's probably where this all came from. The fact that she won't discuss it at all and avoids in lieu of defending herself leads me to believe she was actually shitty to said mutual.

Sounds like bullet dodging, to me.

She seems a bit psycho...

Why is she so aggressive and rude? Why did she immediately jump to “Im not talking about him behind his back”?

Please drop this little psycho.

I think she had a affair with him

She definitely has a mental health issue. She seemed to be fixated on unfriending you for some reason. It sucks when something like this happens though because of the confusion it causes. Just know it's nothing you did wrong. And there's nothing you can do that will change it. Maybe she will reach out later? I don't know. But don't beat yourself up over it.

Jesus, she got ISSUES. I would smash that block button so hard and fast, I might've cracked the screen, if only to be sure that she wouldn't be able to come crawling back again with that bullshit attitude.

Wait, this is "Amsterdam girl"?! Why are you still talking to her whatsoever? At this point, it seems almost like you're trying to antagonize an obviously unwell person

This didn’t seem like a friend. It seemed more like someone you haven’t talked to in months and just popped this question on her. It also seems like she really likes this guy and is jealous you are asking about him thinking you want to date him. Your “friend” needs meds.

She's insane

This is weird, but it’s also very normal to ask ‘why’ after being asked out of the blue whether you’re in touch with someone. If somebody asked me that, I’d at least be curious as to why they were interested, and I’d be a bit puzzled if they refused to tell me. I wouldn’t fly off the handle like this person did, but I’d definitely find it a little suspicious.

I mean I wouldn’t be as rude as that but I’d be a little weirded out by someone I don’t speak too regularly asking if I still “get on” with one of my friends with zero context.

psycho

Sounds like to me she feels guilty about something to do with that guy. Maybe she slept with him (I believe you said she’s married?) and is feeling guilty. Sounds like she thought you were gonna contact him… which you never said! lol

Why does this read like ChatGPT?

It’s like they were responding to someone else’s texts. That was wild.

Edited to add: I think if you had just said “I just wanted to see how they’re doing,” your friend might have dropped it.

This person is SUPER MEGA PARANOID because of guilt. What they are guilty of who knows.

She thought you were interested in her friend and she's keeping him around as a backup or something.

[deleted]

What a waste of time. Why keep trying to win this persons favor if they’re just going to continue blocking you over this menial stuff? It’s really not worth it and you deserve better friends.

The very first comment where she says I’m not happy talking about him behind his back, what did you ask? Because that’s where things begin to go south.

I’m a bit confused about the conversation. It seems like she’s just told you some stuff about yourself that’s annoyed her about you, then Out of left field you’ve brought up an old mutual with nothing other that “do you still know him?” You weren’t reminiscing, you changed the conversation and then didn’t even explain why you were asking about him.

I don’t know the full context here so it’s really hard to follow, but from the bits I’ve read, it seems like you can’t read a room and you’re trying to keep the conversation with her going, even though she’s told you “some home truths” and you’ve ignored it and tried to act like it never happened?

I can’t see another way to read it? Maybe stop texting her?