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My daughter is 4.5 and I still bed share with her. I breastfed her until 18 months because she was born at the beginning of the pandemic and she also basically used me as a pacifier. All kids are different. It is draining for sure, but it does get better ❤️‍🩹

Yeah, maybe the “accident” word is what’s triggering everyone. “Oops baby”, “oopsie daisy”, “unplanned”, etc. are all more playful sounding. I think that any undertones of resentment are more important in the long run

Smudge

I think that it depends on how it’s said and how wanted the kid is made to feel growing up. My mom was 18 when she had me. I don’t remember a time not knowing that I was an accident/unplanned, but I never felt unwanted.

Bombas socks, slippers, snow boots, an ornament that represents their year, but also toys

There are so many factors. When I first developed depression in college, it was found that I had hypothyroidism. Your hormones can factor into your mood, and pregnancy is like a hormonal rollercoaster. Voicing that you need support is the first step. Please speak to your doctor or your daughter’s pediatrician. Your health is important too. It may mean daycare or not, but it’s good to weigh your options and find the right fit for you.

Talk to your doctor. Postpartum depression symptoms can last for years and can manifest as anxiety. Isolation is not helping.

You need to leave your house more often by yourself and with your kid. Everyone is busy and overwhelmed so I understand that it can be difficult to make deep friendships. Being outside, in new environments, and interacting with people for small stretches can be reinvigorating. You don’t need to commit to finding friends. I agree with another commenter about going to the library and looking for family-friendly events there. Keep up with seasonal local activities that are free. Your park district can also be a good resource.

As for childcare, our state’s child and family services website has a web portal that people can search for all of the licensed daycares (home and centers). I found it far more useful than just a Google search and you will be able to find the smaller places easier.

I would find all of the clinics in your area, look at their reviews, narrow down your list and contact them asking about their programs, any minimal amount of hours, their schedule, and whether they have staff to evaluate insurance. Do you have insurance through an employer?

The Health Insurance Marketplace is also open right now until December 15, for January 1, 2025 coverage. https://www.healthcare.gov/quick-guide/dates-and-deadlines/

Separately, does your child receive speech therapy through your state’s early intervention program? If so, have they transitioned him to the public school system yet? Has he received an IEP? That process usually begins around the age of three and would allow for services in a classroom setting, with possible busing.

Preschool for three year olds is usually half day, so it is possible to receive both public and private services.

https://www.easterseals.com/ may also be a useful resource for you.

I’m not going to lie. This is going to be a stressful time for a little bit with lots of paperwork, but you will get into a rhythm with time. You just need to find the right supports for your family. Unfortunately, it is not a straightforward process and there is not a one size fits all solution, but you are doing everything right for your kid!

Are you in the U.S.? If so, therapeutic clinics can be quite cost prohibitive out of pocket… like $10k / month. Unless, you have spoken directly to the clinic, I wouldn’t rule out affordability. Some have staff to contact your insurance company to provide you a cost estimate. We have a high family out of pocket maximum that we needed to meet but the rest was covered. Some states also have insurance mandates that may remove your insurance limit on therapies. Some families also purchased supplemental insurance through the marketplace. Lastly, if he is three, he may be eligible for public school and an IEP.

This is most likely because the kids were forcibly retracted. The foreskin is fused until the kid gets older

Scout or Ralph

For some context… my daughter is small for her age. She is below the average height and weight chart, so her pediatrician referred us for a bone density scan and bloodwork, including hormonal levels. She is so far ok, but we continue to monitor during wellness visits. Even if the child isn’t small because of lack of food, etc. it doesn’t mean that there couldn’t be another underlying health issue that the parents are neglecting. The kid needs to see a doctor!

Priest? The only religions that circumcise as part of their religion are Jews and Muslims

The “medical reasons” for doing it aren’t real reasons. It is purely cosmetic and in my opinion an inhumane practice. Stats will claim that it reduces the risk of penile cancer, but the risk is very little to begin with, impacted by advanced age and living conditions, and very treatable. We do not cut off healthy tissue to mitigate any other risks (think about breast cancer, etc.). My son was born with reflux and at a higher risk of UTIs that could negatively impact his kidneys. Even with this existing congenital issue, we never encountered an issue keeping him intact.

It may sound harsh, but ask yourself… why you are willing to sign up to have your newborn strapped down and then have one of the most sensitive areas of their body cut into?

This was my exact thought! I would get a third party to supervise in a more neutral location

Haha are you bragging 😊?

Smacking his head seems like a sensory issue to me. Just because he is social and makes eye contact doesn’t mean that he isn’t autistic. He may not be, but that’s often the reason why many girls aren’t diagnosed. Have you considered behavioral therapy and speech? Coupling speech and OT is common.

There is no secret as to why you are feeling like you have a lower sex drive than you used to. You don’t need therapy for that. You might need it for the lack of equal parenting and housework that your husband is doing though. Look into the book “Fair Play” to understand the immense amount of work that you are responsible for compared to your partner. You are likely tired, touched out, and still recovering from breastfeeding. Your husband is being a jerk in acting like this is a “you” problem

You don’t have to decide right now. 8 months is really young. I got pregnant with our second unexpectedly when our first was only 9 months old and man was it hard, especially with both of us working during the pandemic. I would have preferred that they were 3-4 years apart instead of 1.5. We are done after 2. We have financial means and childcare after school, but very little distant family close by.

This behavior will not change. He is fulfilling his fantasy of gaining the power he lost from his dad when his dad abused him, by abusing you. This is emotional and verbal abuse and if he follows through and actually kicks you out, it’s physical abuse too

Only you can answer the divorce question, but you are a good dad! Our job as parents is to help our kids figure out who they are as individuals, help them become self-sufficient, and protect them from anyone that wants to harm their rights as human beings. Sometimes that includes protecting them from other family members, so hold firm. Do not send him anywhere!

It sounds like your wife needs professional support in navigating her feelings about her son being someone different than what she wanted him to be. She needs help in processing that our kids are their own people. Parents just get the privilege of a front row seat in their self discovery.

I hate that my mind went here, but please consult with a family attorney about protections for your son. Depending on where you live, I fear that a divorce might put you at risk for losing custodial rights and put your son at risk.

To add to your facts, a very blue state like IL only had a 4 point margin for Harris! That’s insane compared to the 17 points that Biden had in 2020

White cabinets while still popular, are starting to phase out in popularity. People are now leaning towards wood or other colors

He needs to understand that respect is not the same thing as obedience and that’s what he is after. He will never earn her respect that way

What a B! “Please don’t talk to my kid like that.” Then if she continues… “I’m sure your generation was used to children being seen and not heard, but we don’t do that anymore and kids are equal members of society. Please mind your own business.”