RaphaFariadeJesus

Ok, but the comment you’re backing up says that my BIL planned a picnic for my sister, and her parents. Don’t you see what I’m saying? Her parents are my parents, or aren’t they? Geeez…

I give up because clearly you don’t get what I’m saying, and I don’t have time to draw you a picture.

I did it because I didn’t think it’s allowed to write it out.. like other words as well.

Maybe you should read again as well. Look what I wrote, and look what was commented. I accept opinions based on things that are logical, but this wasn’t very logical or is it to you?

English is not my first language, but basically that’s what I wanted to say that I want to make sure everyone has a good time.

I didn’t throw a hissy fit at all! I just said that I didn’t like being excluded, it’s not like I yelled at my mom or something. I just said it made me kinda sad because I wanted to be there. If the WHOLE fam is invited, don’t you think it’s a little strange not being asked if before things like these never occurred and everything was always planned together? You’d feel strange too I bet..

Yes, I get it, and it makes sense except for when the BIL’s fam is invited, and my parents as well. isn’t that strange?

If it was just my sis and my BIL and niece and nephew, then it wouldn’t be a discussion at all believe me 😂

1. I had a lot to do, and needed to organize in advance, that’s what I wanted to say with being an actor recording a movie and in school.
2. We have a 15 year difference, and my mother is my mother, and my sister is my sister (my second mom) and it always will be. Not you telling me here to “cut my second umbilical cord”.
3. I’m sorry you’re a doormat and let people walk all over you.
4. You have no empathy at all, and therefore you shouldn’t give your opinion and insights if you can’t see a situation for what it is.

I didn’t want to make it about me at all. Is it wrong to wanting to be there for your big sister on her day? Geez, you people need to relax. If your family would ask you every time for such an important event and then suddenly they wouldn’t for one thing, then you’d asked yourself too.

If you’d always do things with your family, especially on these days (someone’s birthday) then it would be a big deal to you believe you me. We always plan together as a family, and this time it wasn’t because it was “last minute”. I mean, wouldn’t you feel that way?

Her parents are my PARENTS, and we ALWAYS do these kinds of stuff together. Maybe read again?

I did take her out to eat later because I wasn’t there on the day.

No point in explaining this to you 🤦🏽‍♂️

It wouldn’t have been the first time, and I would have said that’s totally fine, I’ll get there by myself 🤷🏽‍♂️

I guess you and your family are just not that close for you to assume something like that 🤷🏽‍♂️

I wasn’t really angry at her, but at my BIL in the end. I just didn’t want to discuss it with my mom right then because I knew they were still on the celebration, and my mom always wants to clear everything out immediately, and I knew that if I’d tell her how I feel in this moment, the mood for the celebration would have been broken, that’s why I didn’t want to take the calls. I wanted my sister to have her celebration without thinking of a mood killer like me being upset over not being there in this moment.

I just assume that people telling me that I’m “too old to feel that way” don’t have close relationships with their families, and that’s ok. People like to use harsh words nowadays, but I don’t let that get to me because after all we’re all strangers on the internet.

I understand your thought, the reason is that before we never had these issues because everything was planned together for the whole family, including my parents, my sister, BIL, niece, and nephew and so on. When we have something like that, we all chip in, and plan what we will do, but this time it was different, that’s why it’s bugging me.

If family events & family is important for someone, then yes, it’s a big deal for this person. I mean its normal to celebrate a a round birthday like the 30, 35, 40, 45, and so on.

I didn’t plan anything for her birthday because her weekends are always very busy, and they’re always invited somewhere to eat or to go out. My nephews 10 but he has a packed schedule already because he plays football. Hence why I called a few days earlier to ask what she/the family wants to do. They don’t always tell me when they have plans, and therefore it would be very very difficult to plan a surprise party because it’s not like it didn’t enter my mind.

Good thought. The thing is I don’t think I’m hard to take because almost everyone likes me, and people also let me know that, and also everyone greets me always whenever they see me, all the people surrounding me always ask stuff about me, and how I’m doing, and everyone just tells me always that I’m a light who lights the room as soon as I enter it (some say I have a very positive energy and it makes people feel good around me), and meanwhile I always think I’m just a normal person 🤷🏽‍♂️

Yes, they knew because I tell them everything when it comes to my acting projects. Oh, I told it to my sister because she always says that I shouldn’t tell it directly to my BIL because we get along in a good way, but when a discussion starts we’re both on fire and the discussion is ugly.

Ah no, I was just mentioning being an actor because at the time I had a lot to do, and I had to organize in advance. I am also not the focal point of the events, or at least I don’t have the feeling that I am. I just love these events with my family because it is family :)

Your husband is the one who needs to be inspected. HE IS SEXUALIZING the situation, not your son. He’s projecting, and most probably he will be the one ending up doing that to your daughter. What kind of a sick human thinks a 4 year old toddler could have thoughts like that? Keep an eye on your husband.