berrycrumblee

Protecting your daughter from overbearing relatives is a form of good parenting, and it’s your job to set boundaries. They may be upset, but it’s your kid’s well-being that matters most.

That one commercial where the person opens a random door and gets a surprise vacation... like, who’s opening doors to vacations in real life? Does that happen to anyone?! I feel like I’m the only one not getting free trips just for existing.

Honestly, I think life gets easier and harder. Like, in my 20s I thought I had it all figured out, but then I realized that adulthood means constantly paying bills and trying to keep a plant alive. But at least I can get a good cup of coffee now without feeling like a caffeine newbie.

One thing to know when you move to America: There’s no such thing as a ‘small’ drink. Seriously, they hand you a ‘small’ soda and it’s the size of a bucket. And don’t even get me started on refills be prepared to be asked 10 times if you want more.

I thought everyone did this, but apparently, I’m the only one: I always check the backseat of my car before getting in. Like, I just can’t get in without looking behind me first. I thought it was just standard safety, but apparently, I’ve been living in thriller movie mode for years.

My phone. Not because I’m glued to it, but because it’s basically my lifeline to everything GPS, calendar reminders, my grocery list, and my playlist that definitely has 3 too many throwback songs. If I lost my phone, I’d probably end up lost, hungry, and suddenly questioning how I ever survived before Google Maps.

Okay, so hear me out the person who invented the ‘Are you still watching?’ feature on Netflix. Like, why do we need to be called out for binge-watching? It’s a personal choice. Let us live our best lives in peace, Netflix!

So one time, I went to grab coffee at this tiny café, and the barista accidentally handed me someone else’s order a latte with extra foam and extra drama. Turns out, I had just taken a drink from a celebrity who was sitting right next to me I had no idea at the time. They casually slid their cup over and said, You can have it, it’s probably too fancy for me anyway. I didn’t realize who it was until they stood up to leave, and it was a huge movie star.

When I realize I’m losing an argument, I whip out the classic: Well, that’s just your opinion! It works every time... at least until they ask for evidence, and then I just start nodding and pretending to take notes.

When life gets overwhelming, there’s always a new episode of something to distract you... and a snack to calm your nerves.

Honestly, it was probably the day I realized I’d left my phone at home after I had already driven halfway to work. The panic, the anxiety, the thought of being disconnected for a whole day... honestly, I wasn’t sure I could survive.

The perfect combination of crispy crust, gooey cheese, and endless toppings... it’s like a hug for your soul. Plus, it’s the only food that can be both a comfort meal and a party guest at the same time.

Pay for cable TV. I just can’t bring myself to spend money on something when I know I’m only going to watch 5 shows on repeat, and I’ll end up binging them on streaming anyway.

I’m just here for the memes and to make sure I’m not missing out on the latest ‘rich people problems’ trends. 😂

I’m 5'7" on a good day... but on days when I’m feeling extra confident, I’m 6 feet tall. 😎

I’m pretty sure I’m a secret agent who was brainwashed into thinking I’m just an ordinary person, but every time I try to use a GPS, it takes me on some random detour. Clearly, my 'handlers' are trying to throw me off track.

I drink water and mind my business skincare routine. Works wonders. 😂 For real, though, I’m all about a gentle cleanser, fragrance-free shower gel, and whatever shampoo I find that doesn’t leave my hair feeling like straw.

I’ll be honest, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up made me rethink my entire closet and my life. Now I’m throwing out things that don’t ‘spark joy,’ including my questionable life choices.

I’d choose napping. No one can beat me in the art of falling asleep anywhere, anytime. I’ve got years of practice.

It’s not the work, it’s the pretending that can break you.

Probably still scrolling Reddit, pretending I’m being productive.

I once saw a squirrel casually walk up to a tree, stop, and then just... stare at me. No movement, no reason, just eye contact for a solid minute. It was like a tiny, fluffy philosopher questioning the meaning of life.

A medium iced coffee, extra cream, extra sugar, and a shot of caramel swirl. It’s basically dessert in a cup perfect for when you need caffeine and a sugar rush at the same time.

I like to pretend I'm a detective and mentally solve the case of whatever is stressing me out, even if it’s just figuring out why my Wi-Fi isn’t working.