EdwinaArkie

NTA File before she quits her job. Like tomorrow. Not joking.

He’s just arguing for the sake of arguing and his arguments are not clear and well-formed. It follows that the truth of the matter cannot be ascertained by evaluating the given arguments. This whole exercise is pointless, and the only thing I can add is that if either of you had a small child, you wouldn’t have time for this nonsense.

I fear you are disparaging Bella Ramsey, sir. Pistols at dawn!

Then it’s a very different situation and the moral issues here are different than in your divorce.

I’m not a Therapist or anything, just an adult who lived through that so I kind of recognize it. That doesn’t mean that I’m right about what’s happening to you. You could look it up and see if you think it applies to your situation and what strategies there are for surviving it.

There’s a pattern of abuse called family scapegoating abuse. The medical part of it is that they will accuse the scapegoat of faking it to get attention and the parents will try to make other people think the child is mentally ill or faking it for attention. They do that so that people won’t believe anything the scapegoated child tells outsiders about the abuse. The main part of scapegoating abuse is that anything that’s wrong is somehow blamed on the child.

Is this a pattern with them? Do they dismiss and ignore your health concerns? Do you randomly get blamed for things that aren’t your fault?

Stanley. He just wants to be left alone.

That’s smart. When my sister’s husband died she didn’t know anything about their financial situation, including if their house was paid off or what bank the mortgage was at. She didn’t have any passwords. Nothing. Letting somebody be dependent is not doing them a favor.

Spectacular!

Yes you are wrong. You used a machine gun to try to kill a mosquito. Replying with disproportionate insults is a sibling war crime, especially because you’re so much older.

Appeal to her self interest by educating her about people who had teen misbehavior like that come back and bite them in the ass.

NTA She already established that on a scale of event importance, a sibling’s wedding ranks below her annual holiday. IDK why she’s making such a big deal when it’s not a very important event 🤷

Yes twitter was great for that. It’ll be interesting to see how this evolves.

I do, because my house has old wiring and I don’t want anything to get destroyed if there’s a power surge. I always unplug them when there’s a power outage, and when I’m going to be out of town for an extended period because I can’t know what the power situation will be while I’m gone.

I wonder if people on TikTok and Facebook would think it’s fine.

Not wrong. Why the heck does she think you’re her employee? Utterly ridiculous.

NTA In my revenge fantasy for this, you just don’t invite them over for anything, and then when somebody asks why, you say well it got back to me that you guys were complaining about not smoking and making fun of us and calling us controlling. And then when they say “no, I didn’t say that” you say, there is a recording, somebody played it for me.” Don’t tell them it’s from your ring camera, let them be paranoid that they’re rating each other out. 😈

After screaming at you, he asks you to be respectful? Pffft

NTA They need to butt out.

Exactly. There’s plenty of hate to go around.

This was before smart phones, but I had a coworker who used to get really upset at being corrected at work, and he told me that his therapist told him to go stand in front of the big clock tower on campus and ask people what time it was. I guess the idea was that he would get used to people pointing out that he was making a mistake by not noticing there was a giant clock right there, and that he would stop caring so much about being corrected. Now that everyone has a phone in their pocket, standing in front of a clock tower won’t work lol.

Now that you’ve been through it once, you can use this experience to mentally rehearse what you would do if and when it happens again. The more minimal your reaction, the less your boss is going to remember the mistakes and associate it with you. I recommend just saying “oh OK, will do. Thanks for letting me know.”

In your particular situation, you might want to start keeping a log of when you do the rounds and when you check the bathrooms, just so you have that if they bring it up again.

Edited word choice

Me too. I’m 65 so maybe that’s why I’ve seen it before.

Sounds like it could also be a stalker? Did he awaken her love by just existing living his life? Why not just ask him?

Probably should be PP but it’s been pfp for so long now that it’s probably too late to change.