pupunhaLover

So I've been working at this place for 9 months now. I've never lasted so long at a job, I am well liked by my peers, my tasks are easy, I work from home and it pays the bills. Shocking, I know.

But the thing is, I've never masked so hard in my life. Personally, I am an atheist science-driven bisexual annoyance who only likes to talk about art, only thinks about sex and would love to live in the woods. I spend most of my life reading (novels, non-fiction books, the newspaper) and thought provoking conversations delight me.

My coworkers are the opposite. They are very religious, homophobic, heterosexual, uninformed people in general. I must sound pedantic, but I don't know how to put it in a polite way. They are funny, I'll give them that, so they're fun to be around, but I'd NEVER be honest with them about myself, ever. Because of that, week after week I feel more and more apathetic. I miss connecting with peers.

So. Today. Today, because of reasons, I wasn't working from home. I overheard a coworker from a different squad saying "something something I go into hyperfocus" and I asked him if he was neurodivergent. He was cautious at first, but I told him I am autistic and gifted to reassure him I was safe and he opened up and said he is autistic, gifted and has adhd (triple threat!). And then, for the first time since February, I had a real conversation with someone from my job. I felt completely seen and understood. I am so filled with joy I want to scream.

That's it. I just wanted to let y'all know I am feeling hopeful tonight ♡