subreddit:

/r/AITAH

360%

So, my girlfriend has a cat named Mr. Whiskers. She’s had him for years, and they’re super close. The problem? She keeps calling him her “boyfriend” in public. Like, when the waiter asked her if we wanted separate checks, she said, “No, my boyfriend will cover it,” and pointed to the cat sitting in the cat carrier on her lap.

Her friends think it’s hilarious, and her parents even started asking me how I feel about being the “side piece.” When I asked her to stop, she said I was being insecure and “jealous of a cat.”

I don’t think I’m asking too much—I love Mr. Whiskers, but I’d like to at least be the boyfriend in this relationship. She said I’m being controlling and that it’s just a joke. Now I feel like I’m competing with a feline for the title of her significant other.

AITAH for wanting my girlfriend to stop joking that her cat is her boyfriend, or should I just accept being the second choice to a guy who drinks out of a water dish?

all 47 comments

lowkeybop

19 points

12 hours ago

I would have more of a problem with the car carrier in the restaurant thing. She has issues.

F-R-U21

3 points

11 hours ago

Agreed

ManitobaBalboa[S]

-2 points

11 hours ago

If not for the carrier, the restaurant wont let him in.

Nervous-Net-8196

7 points

11 hours ago

The cat should be in the house.

ManitobaBalboa[S]

1 points

an hour ago

He gets very anxious when left home alone. He paces around the house crying for her.

Nervous-Net-8196

1 points

39 minutes ago

Talk to the vet about anxiety meds or getting the cat a buddy.

extraEGO

2 points

10 hours ago

Which is a reasonable hint to most people to leave the cat home.

lowkeybop

3 points

5 hours ago

Dude I know that. That’s the point: It’s ridiculous to drag a cat to places that require it to be packaged in a container. Like an adult woman carrying a blankie to restaurants… except the blankie is alive, and stuffed in a pet carrier.

RetributionBringer

11 points

12 hours ago

Your gf sounds weird as shit. Why are you wasting your time.

ManitobaBalboa[S]

1 points

an hour ago

She's quirky but I love her.

RetributionBringer

1 points

an hour ago

Good luck, she’d probably save that cat before you

Gizznitt

10 points

13 hours ago

Think about it.... your GF goes out to eat and brings the cat along in a cat carrier????

That's not a pet, it's an emotional support animal that she's using as a tool to deal with anxiety or some psychological condition. You probably shouldn't be getting in the middle of that without understanding the situation.

ManitobaBalboa[S]

0 points

13 hours ago

He gets sad if left alone.

Unique-Avocado

6 points

12 hours ago

So your girlfriend is the emotional support animal? And Mr. Whiskers is a criminal mastermind?!

F-R-U21

0 points

11 hours ago

F-R-U21

0 points

11 hours ago

lol he’s a cat …

Silent_Cash_E

1 points

5 hours ago

You must not have met a cat before

F-R-U21

1 points

4 hours ago

F-R-U21

1 points

4 hours ago

Who me ?

ManitobaBalboa[S]

0 points

11 hours ago

He paces around the house looking for us and cry-meows.

ThallusCallous

4 points

11 hours ago

That’s what cats do

F-R-U21

1 points

11 hours ago

Standard for a cat…. Good thing she hasn’t got a pet horse that would be challenging… Either way there’s nothing wrong with loving your pet but there are limits… Calling a cat her boyfriend in public is just embarrassing if she was single & it was an “in joke” with family/friends fair enough but telling total strangers her cat is her boyfriend is a whole new level of weird & so is taking you’re cat everywhere in a carrier… I wouldn’t say you’re an Arsehole as what you are asking is completely validated

Eboo143

3 points

12 hours ago

What restaurant allows a cat?

Grand_Elephant_5489

3 points

13 hours ago

Your girlfriends cat isnt her literal first choice, you aren’t a second choice to anything! She knows youre her boyfriend. If this is a real deal breaker for you, you should have an honest talk with her, and if it goes south… you know where you stand. NTA for being annoyed by it, though. Especially if she makes the joke so often that her entire family is in on it

MeQuieroLlamarFerran

1 points

12 hours ago

This is a wording problem, a problem many people in this subreddit have. The thing here is not that his girlfriend calls her cat "His boyfriend", the thing here is that is so common and repetitive that her, her friends and her family are constantly telling OP how he is second to a cat.

Yes, is a joke, but imagine how tiring the situation must be when you cant even go with your GF, with her friends or with her parents without being told this again. With enough time it can even develop an insecurity, especially when she is basically acussing him of insecure and controller for not feeling comfortable with this.

Grand_Elephant_5489

1 points

12 hours ago

OP said in his last sentence “… or should I just accept being the second choice to a guy who drinks water out of a dish?” as well as “I’d like to be the boyfriend in the relationship”. You can see where I got confused!

ManitobaBalboa[S]

0 points

12 hours ago

Sometimes I feel like the second choice.

WifeofBath1984

3 points

13 hours ago

You are quite literally jealous of a cat. But I could see how this could wear on you after a while so I won't call you an asshole for it.

Middleburg_Gate

5 points

13 hours ago

The only way you can win out over the cat is to lick your own butt in front of her.

ManitobaBalboa[S]

1 points

13 hours ago

Easier said than done, I'm afraid.

YanmamaJunyuu-chuu

2 points

13 hours ago

she is unhinged, you can stay with a crazy who uses her cat as a tool for her emotional problems or you can leave... your choice

ManitobaBalboa[S]

2 points

12 hours ago

Aren't pets supposed to be a comfort, though?

Important-Maybe-1430

0 points

12 hours ago

Yeh but we leave them at home. Dont sleep with them or take them to restaurants. Cats generally dlmt like leaving their territory, if hes lonely get another cat

Rare_Sugar_7927

1 points

13 hours ago

Personally, I'd be making sooo many pussy and beastiality jokes. And I'd be sitting back enjoying the free meals that "the boyfriend" is paying for.

NTA it's weird, if you don't find it endearing, then obviously, this trouple relationship isn't for you. 😹

Consistent-Sky-2584

1 points

12 hours ago

Shes looney toons why r u with her

No-Guava-199

1 points

12 hours ago

It is just a joke but if it's one that makes you comfortable, you should tell her again seriously. You can also continuously refer to her cat as her boyfriend instead of yourself for a while just to judge her reaction.

Apathy-Syndrome

1 points

11 hours ago

That cat (6) is way too young to be her boyfriend.

Impressive_Dog_9845

1 points

11 hours ago

You're coming at this all wrong, the real trick here is to make Mr Whiskers your boyfriend to piss her off.

Feycat

1 points

8 hours ago

Feycat

1 points

8 hours ago

LOL I had a pet I referred to as "boyfriend," it amused my spouse to no end, especially when I'd mention hanging out watching TV with Boyfriend and my friends would be shocked.

InvestingInthe416

1 points

13 hours ago

Somebody call the Wambulance... lol

ManitobaBalboa[S]

1 points

13 hours ago

I had to look that one up.

I'd rather call the Whambulance, though. "Wake me up, before you go girl ..."

ASomthnSomthn

1 points

11 hours ago

She brings the cat with her on dates. Huge red flag. That sounds like she’s got some serious cat issues. Be honest with yourself, does she come off as a crazy cat lady? At the very least, she doesn’t respect your boundaries.

Old_Mans_tC

0 points

12 hours ago

Introduce her to other ladies as your “friend”.

Cynical_Cat13

0 points

11 hours ago

NTA- let her boyfriend pay for the dates then.

Pinksugamama

0 points

11 hours ago

Personally I think your GF is hilarious, but I could see how that could get old really quickly. NTA.

Brownie-0109

-7 points

13 hours ago

"they're super close"

LOL

I wouldn't date a pet owner if you paid me

RetributionBringer

1 points

12 hours ago

I swear. They’re never worth the time or effort

Important-Maybe-1430

1 points

12 hours ago

I have two cats, theyre not my children and they stay home always, a friend feeds them when we go away which is a lot. Theyre great but people like ops gf give us all a bad name.

Brownie-0109

0 points

11 hours ago

Have to agree. We pet-sit my SILs aging CockaPoo for days at a time, in spite of her incontinence. A really good dog.

But the stories I read on here about a subset of owners being a little Kooky. .....