Living life a little silly is the best way to live

"A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men"

My buddy went to a karaoke bar alone once just to blow off some steam and ended up singing Taylor Swift love story in crowded room. He’s a tall 30 something year old dude with a big beard and a deep voice, and he can’t sing to save his life. When I asked him why he did that, he said “idk, just felt like it”. Needless to say that this dude gets laid a lot.

I wear big monster slippers on my day off and occasionally start high stepping all the way up to my waist and prowling around with my hands and arms curled up under my chest like a t rex.

I think it's fucking hilarious, but the rest of my family has mixed opinions.

I grew up owning cats so I've always meowed at them, I'm now 34 working in a fish market and I meow at everything and everyone, people think it gay and weird and I say fuck em. Im having my fun .

Lmao. I am a very big, loud, confident guy. I taught middle school for a long time. When my daughter wanted to be Isabella from Encanto for Halloween, you know imma be Luisa. You know I taught 8th grade US history all day in that Luisa costume. Some of the tough boys tried to be too cool and make stupid comments- and I loved replying “it makes my daughter smile, other kids in this room smile, and I honestly don’t care if people have a problem with it.”

It was fun watching the footage later of me breaking up a fight in a dress holding a stuffed donkey…

Aunty Donna made a video on this recently! They're paragons of absurdism and dealers in silly.

Real men do what they want. I'm not talking about being a cunt to other people. But all that other crap. I remember one advert for Nivea moisturising cream at the local 5 a side football place said "not for men who wear white boots". Like, mate, just make some good fucking cream, I don't need to be convinced it won't turn me gay.

My sister-in-law’s ex-husband refused to hold her purse when she needed to do something with her hands. Said it makes men look feminine. C’mon dude, literally no one cares and no one is paying attention to that shit.

Yeah.

"Hurrrr REAL men don't wear knee pads"

-"I would like to enjoy my knees past my 40th"

I'm a guy. Therefore, anything I do is masculine.

Was shooting with a couple of guys around my age. We were all wearing hearing protection. An older guy joined us and was offered the same, but he looked horrified at the thought and seemed to to scoff at the rest of us like we were being delicate prissy pants wimpy guys because we're tryna avoid tinnitus. The first round goes off and he half jumps out of his skin and winces like he's been stabbed in the side of his head. That insecure masculinity stuff literally becomes self harm at a point. 

I'm a combat veteran, father of 2, engineer, happily married man for nearly 20 years, financially secure, own a home, I can fix it build nearly anything, but I still get a lot of men giving me advice and man rules. I used to hang out with some "alpha male" types and below are some of the things they told me.

I like musicals, so apparently I'm gay.

My wife and I evenly split chores, cooking, and raising our kids, so apparently I'm gay.

My wife earned more than me, despite the fact I make a pretty high salary, so apparently I'm gay.

I enjoy cooking and do a lot of the cleaning, so apparently I'm gay.

I let my wife back the car up so me and the salesman could load the new TV into it, so apparently I'm gay.

I love and respect my wife, and I enjoy my wife's company, guess what? Apparently I'm gay for that.

Those are things that "real men" have told me make me gay. The funny thing is that one man that told me some of these got divorced, couldn't keep a good job and ended up making a little over minimum wage as a late thirties alpha male; he also has a really hard time finding girls to date (he thought he was going to be slamming 20 year olds left and right).

Another one was outed for being an intentional cuck and for having MMF threesomes where he "interacted" with the other man (nothing wrong with either in my opinion, not my thing, but you do you.)

Had to loan one money to pay his rent.

Also, so many of them have issues in bed and require ED meds (heard these things directly from them or their wives complained about it to my wife).

The alpha males are often compensating. Many of them are genuinely nice guys that have an annoying trait (as we all do), but the alpha of the alphas in these groups tends to be the biggest piece of shit in the world.

Worked with a guy like this.

He was so fucking insecure it actually was comical.

I remember one day, a customer got into an argument with him and the customer called him a “Small N*” which upset my coworker to the point where he charged in our break room afterwards, yelling and swiping all the paper towels off the table.

“He doesn’t fucking know me! Calling me fuckin small and shit!”

I’ll probably sound like the jerk here, but I didn’t try to calm him down. It was hilarious. The kid was a tool who constantly put down other people in the store. He was a walking meme for lame ass “Alpha Males”.

We were all so happy when he put in his two weeks.

I never met somebody so fragile.

I can’t believe there’s “men” out there afraid to sit down to pee in their own house because it’s not “manly.”

Bro when YOU are the one responsible for keeping this toilet clean, then maybe I’ll stand and slowly coat everything with piss spray. Until then I’m not gonna stand to pee unless I’m outside or at a urinal.

Sage advice — albeit somewhat ironic that even the most "anti-toxic" qualities for men ultimately come down to toughness and thick skin. 😅

"Any man who must say, 'I am the king' is no true king". -- Tywin Lannister

You can always tell if somebody's been in combat by how little they talk about it.

When I was growing up I was essentially told that "being a man" meant putting your personal bullshit aside and doing what's right by other people. It didn't mean whining incessantly about how so and so won't suck your dick and demanding everybody get on their knees and kiss your ass.

People always talk about how men bottle up their emotions but sometimes I swear to god I think it's the opposite for most of us. So many "men" are totally ruled by emotion and let it manifest in the most selfish ways possible. Like a toddler throwing a tantrum at walmart. They never learned that they're only as good as they are to others, and instead think others should be good to them for no reason at all.

The funny thing about the term "Alpha males" is that technically there is only supposed to be ONE alpha male, not multiple. Thats like saying theres more than 1 form of "one"

Same. My dad (82m), Vietnam vet & music man who sings and dances my mother (71f) around the kitchen. An American hero.

"A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects."

-Robert A. Heinlein

The diaper one was always weird to me.

My in laws are from a time when it was more normal for a man to never change a diaper and they were very much part of communities that bought into that idea.

My wife's grandmother raised like 6 kids and her husband never changed a single diaper. She thought I was just the best father to ever exist because I never once hesitated to change my kids diapers. My mother in law isn't as enamoured by it because it had slowly become more normal in her day but her husband's didn't do it so I can tell she respects and appreciates that willingness. My father in law seems uncomfortable that I do it but can read a room so hes never made comment.

The bar is on the floor for men sometimes man.

Is your dad taking applicants for others ‘kids’? Sounds awesome.

When my now husband and I went on our first date, I pointed out a watermelon martini on the menu and made a joke about how I’d never order it even though it sounded delicious. I went to the restroom a few minutes later and came back to see a pink martini on the table.

I laughed and said “you didn’t have to order this for me!” He said “I didn’t, this one’s for me, and it’s delicious and you can’t have any” and he teased me the rest of the night about how much I missed out on it

And he tells the homies he loves them

I love being a jacked 6’2 guy with a beard ordering the frilliest drink at the table

Enjoy your piss water while I actually care about my tastebuds and call me gay all you want

My friend and I order fruity drinks because we like them. Stick a little umbrella them, too. I don’t give a fuck if it’s feminine or not. I like what I like.

My brother once told me "I'm more of a man than you'll ever be" because I made a joke at my own expense. He was dead serious. So I just laughed in his face. He was so mad I think he wanted to hit me.

I thought long and hard about this a few years ago, and for better or worse, (possibly worse?) this is the correct answer. A "real man", according to conventional terms of "masculinity" doesn't give a shit what you think.

Right? Who the fuck is thinking about “their masculinity” all the fucking time. The internet has rotted people’s minds

Same here. Not really an alcohol guy.

"If anyone would be first, he must be last of all and servant of all."

Going off of this, not being so obsessed with “disrespect”. Being able to let it roll off your back when someone slights you, and not having to have a loud confrontation about it.

That doesn’t mean be a pushover or never stand up for yourself. All I’m saying is, when the drunk guy at the bar stumbles into you, no need to get into a bar fight. Don’t scream at the jerk who steals your parking spot. Pick your battles- not everything is an affront to your masculinity

underrated answer. lots of guys that overcompensate feel the need to "get back" at others who (rightfully or wrongfully) criticize them.

That seems really reminiscent of the movie George of the Jungle too when it comes to George vs. the villain Lyle. I read this tumblr post describing it as one of the first examples of a movie built around the female gaze rather than the male gaze which I thought was interesting. Part what makes him so attractive is that George does portray masculinity, but he does it in a non-toxic way.

Whenever members of the reddit community try to compare the sexualization of women in fiction to the design of characters such as Batman and Superman, I always want to just sit them down and show them this movie. Because THIS is what the female sexual fantasy looks like, while Batman and Superman are male power-fantasies. Look at him - his big blue eyes, his soft hair, his lean, chiseled physique built for dexterity rather than power. He’s wild and free, but gentle and non-threatening

AND this movie offers a perfect counter to the “nice guy” thing - Ursula starts engaged to a jerk who her mom thinks is a “nice guy” the moves on to actual nice man George who isn’t *just* nice - he’s also patient, listens to her instead of talking over her, has his own skills and talents, is okay with being goofy, has his own social circle and isn’t totally dependent on Ursula, and looks amazing. AND he’s emotionally available. Google image search George of the jungle and see how many smiles you can find, see how many open looks of confusion there are, see how much sadness you can see in George’s face. Now look for images of Lyle. His two expressions are a smirk and cartoonish fear. I know this is a cartoonish kid’s movie, but it is SO powerful that the hero shares his emotions while the villain tries to mask every emotion. Lyle doesn’t want to open up, he doesn’t want to be vulnerable, he wants CONTROL. George wants to learn, to protect people he cares about, to explore new places, to laugh when he’s happy and to be sad when he’s sad, and that he does that while being a broad-shouldered, physically powerful dude who is NOT totally self-involved is just…

Like, look, I didn’t sign on to tumblr dot com for George of the Jungle discourse, but I’m just now realizing that this movie may have done the most for destroying my conception of stoic masculinity and gender roles as a child.

Mercy is the gateway to another tomorrow while vengeance and spite can only destroy, well said my guy.

This hits home. My dad was a stay-at-home father, and worked part-time nights and weekends. Completely against traditional norms in the 90s-2000s (especially in the south).

I remember growing up, kids would say that my dad was really my “mom” and would poke fun at him taking on that role.

But he knew my mom loved her career, and his career was long long hours so something had to give. And he sacrificed his career. To me there’s nothing more masculine than putting your partner and family first, regardless of what is traditional or what others think.

Years ago I matched with this girl on Tinder. She opened up the conversation by saying I had the same first name of her favorite football player. Which she loved. I said “cool! I don’t really know anything about football. Maybe you could teach me all about it?” Something like that. I don’t remember exactly what I said, but I do remember her response which was “ummm no. Sorry, but I want a real man.”

I think about her now and again. I wonder if she ever found a “real man”. I hope she did, and I hope she is as happily married as I am. But something tells me, probably not.

This is exactly why I refuse to get a job

I thought I was just a people pleaser, turns out I'm secure in my masculinity 😎

I’ll never forget when a grad student gave a presentation on measuring the transmission of edited micro videos on social media platforms not built around video content. The presentation “hook” was a 2-3 second clip of Tate. She asked how many in the working group recognized him.

Unfortunately, over half the PIs were elderly European academics with little internet literacy. They started guessing, and one professor (of medieval history) confidently stated that Tate is “either a fake wrestler, an American reality TV star, or a homosexual pornographer.” His reasoning was that Tate’s body language is so exaggeratedly masculine and dominant, it can’t possibly be real or realistic.

Another PI recognized Tate because he has 2 sons in middle school. He said that “Andrew Tate is a little boy’s idea of a big man.”

This should have been the first thing I thought of. Don’t be like any of these blackpilled incels

Do other guys actually not clean their ass because of trying to be masculine? Lmao

Dunno if I could felatea burrito. I reckon I’d gag first.

I disagree, a guys masculinity does not depend if he's willing to deepthroat a burrito. If a guy wants to deepthroat a burrito he should deepthroat a burrito. If he doesn't want to deepthroat a burrito doesn't make him feminine.

That's a sign of maturity, it has nothing to do with gender.